Look What He Did With Me!

On Sunday I had the BYU channel on in the morning and I listened to a talk given at a BYU Devotional by Elder Don R. Clarke.  In the talk he said he was working on a personal history and had a chapter about his wife entitled--look what she did with me. He was speaking of his wife but I started to think about what my life was because I married your grandpa.  I still smile as I write my thoughts because I know that falling in love with Grandpa changed my life.  And the changes have been wonderful.  I remember when he asked me to dance at a YSA activity (not what it was called back in our day!).  For just a few minutes we chatted and I smiled because he was so serious when I jokingly asked him if he was related to the people who made the cake mix Duncan-Hines or the Duncan Yo-yo.  He proceeded to tell me a little of the history of how the Duncan's came to be.  Grandpa was always a fish out of water around people but he really stretched himself to be a part of the group and interact with everyone.  I think he decided to marry me because he felt comfortable to ramble on and I honestly was so in awe of how smart he was that I didn't mind.  Sometimes people say that girls marry someone like their father.  In my case that was far from the truth.  I loved my dad and grew to understand him and appreciate the struggles that made him do some of the things he did but I knew I didn't want to be married to someone like him.  Your grandpa was a polar opposite.  He was patient.  He was a gospel scholar.  He struggled to make decisions and honored me by listening to my advice and acting on the ideas I shared with him.  He made me a better parent because of the way he loved your mom and dads.  Often my dad's temper was evidenced in my reaction to misbehavior but grandpa was the epitome of patience and kindness.  He would sit for hours to read, or help with homework, or encourage and share his beliefs and his belief in his children.  I had never had that experience and I learned from him what a loving parent should do.

I feel sad sometimes that the younger grandchildren won't get to know Grandpa the way some of the older ones did.  In spite of that your grandpa has left a legacy of hard work, serving honorably in any assignment that he is given.  He wasn't always treated fairly in some of his jobs but he never stopped showing respect to those he worked with.  He was willing to take a chance and went back to school in his 50's to become a teacher.  He never quit learning.  Alzheimer's disease may have taken grandpa's memories away but I am so grateful I still have all of them.  And those memories are the greatest blessing that I have.  What did grandpa do with me--he made me better than I was!