Caregiver Tip

#24  Keep it simple
We are at a stage in the disease where it is important to keep it simple.  My goal from the beginning was to keep grandpa with me.  That requires much physical effort on my part.  Fortunately, I have the extra weight and grandpa is thin so I have so far been able to deal with whatever comes along.  What I would have liked was to have him remain in clothes that he would have preferred to wear and shoes that tied before he got sick.  But what we wish for and what often has to happen is not the same.  One of the things I have actually appreciated in dealing with Alzheimer's is the fact that there is no memory, so there is no yearning.  This makes change inconsequential to him.  The other day I heard grandpa yelling, "come out! come out!"  I found him in the bathroom looking at himself in the mirror.  I had to explain to him that he was looking at himself and there wasn't someone there.  A few days later I had combed his hair with him complaining the whole time.  I told him to come and see how nice he looked.  When I brought him to the mirror he looked at himself and asked, "Who is that?"  So in spite of all the changes we are making it isn't as hard as I was worried it would be.  No shirts to button, no pants to zip, no belt to buckle, and no shoes to tie.  For me that means a quick dress with a minimal amount of time having grandpa yelling at me and I prefer that.  I like the changes and as the warm weather continues to come on it makes me feel better that he is cool and believe or not--comfortable.  Grandpa was always a person who I believed "over-thought" things and because of that he struggled making decisions about things happening in his life.  In some ways the kindness of this mean disease is that he is never worried for long about anything.  Even better is that when I have lost my temper and scolded him he doesn't seem to even be bothered by it.  I may beat myself up that I wasn't kind enough but he just moves on.   Isn't it interesting how we may lose one thing but gain another in the process.  It is never the end and that is a simple truth!