Caregiver Tips

#21  You can't live in fear
I am realizing on a daily basis how little I know about the progress of this disease.  I have found that when I start getting into a "groove" that is when things will again change.  I loved a quote by Elder Holland.  He said; "Don't wait to live.  This isn't a rehearsal; this isn't a dry run; this isn't a pre-performance routine.  This is it.  This is real life.  Don't wait.  Savor every minute."  I try each day to embrace that thought.  Life will go on in spite of my hesitancy and so I have to remember to stop waiting for the next shoe to drop.  When it happens that will be the time to deal with it.  Anticipating only causes me to worry needlessly.  Often what I think will happen doesn't and what I don't expect will become our new norm.

I have learned so much about Grandpa through this process and I have also learned so much about myself.  I am definitely being refined and that thought encourages me.  It tells me that Heavenly Father truly believes in me and puts challenges in each day to make me reach a little higher and to be a little better.  I am developing a sense of empathy that surprises me.  I have to be honest and tell you that I often pray that Grandpa will not have to linger in this "stupor" for much longer but I also pray that I will have the strength to help him until he is released from what we often call this frail existence!  Elaine Dalton taught, "Life teaches us that we can achieve happiness when we seek the happiness and well-being of others."  I am proof that that is the true.

When President Nelson was interviewed by the Arizona Republic on a recent visit here, he said such a profound and true statement.  "If there is anything, I've learned in my 94 years of living, it is that a life with God is far better--more filled with hope, than one without Him.  Faith in God is, and has always been the preeminent force for good in this world.  It is the most enduring source of peace for minds and hearts."  I have been able to enjoy that knowledge numerous times in this process.  I have received personal witness that God lives, that He loves your grandpa and He loves me.  Please know grandkids that you don't have to wait until you feel so beat down you aren't sure how to move forward because nothing that you may be dealing with can't be made better by a loving Father and a Savior who wants you to be strong and to keep fighting the good fight.

Lucky for Grandpa

Lucky for Grandpa that I know who his one and only girlfriend was before he met me.  If not I would be a little annoyed at him.  For the last week he has been calling me Linda.  I have no idea where this new name has come from but I'm kind of getting use to it!

Moving Day!

The California Duncans are getting closer to their move in date.  They signed loan documents today and will be moving into their house next Friday.  Uncle Andy sent me a few pictures as a preview.  I think the house is beautiful and can't wait to see it once the two of them work their magic!  Just having grass must be wonderful for them!  Oh and the pool is probably a plus too--at least for Ava and Caleb!

So Proud!

The only regret I have as a caregiver for Grandpa is that we can't travel to participate in all of the wonderful activities that you grandkids are a part of.  Last Sunday Ellis and his dad spoke in church in preparation for him getting ready to leave on his mission.  Last night he went to the temple with his parents to get his endowments.  Elder Bednar taught, "A principal purpose of the temple is to elevate our vision from the things of the world to the blessings of eternity.  Removed for a short time from the world settings with which we are familiar, we can "look to God and live." by receiving and remembering the great and precious promises whereby we become partakers of the divine nature." (Oct 2017 Conference). 

Ellis I am so proud of you.  I want you to know that when I was in the temple yesterday morning I prayed that you would have a positive experience and recognize the significant covenants you would make while there.  For the next two years you are going to have some of the hardest and yet most rewarding experiences as a missionary.  I hope that when you return you will be able to say, as many missionaries do, that it was the best two years of your life.  In reality those two years will prepare you for many more best experiences that are to come.  You got this grandson!

Great Day!

After over three years without being able to attend the temple I was able to go today.  It was a wonderful experience and made even better because my dear friend Barb Walker was with me.  The Gilbert Temple is beautiful inside and I loved how crowded it was.  I was so sure I would cry through the whole session but instead when I sat down an incredible feeling of peace came over me.  I have to be honest that it has been a long time since I felt like everything was going to be okay.

Interesting

I was just doing my scripture study tonight and read two verses that really caught my attention.  They were in Mormon 5:17-18.  In verse 17 it says, "They were once a delightsome people, and they had Christ for their shepherd; yea, they were led even by God the Father."  Then in verse 18 it says, "But now, behold, they are led about by Satan, even as chaff is driven before the wind, or as a vessel is tossed about upon the waves, without sail or anchor, or without anything wherewith to steer her; and even as she is, so are they."   I realized that is exactly the difference in the plan of salvation.  Jesus Christ would lead but never force and give all the glory to Heavenly Father.  Satan, on the other hand, had no respect for agency.  Once we make a decision to turn away from God--Satan then manipulates us and takes away our agency and we go whichever way he wants us to.  Thankfully, the atonement makes it possible for us to repent and again follow the Savior but that requires us to want to be led instead of being driven.

It Works!

So I have some good news and some bad news.  The bad news is that the Fire department showed up at our house this morning to rescue me.  The good news is that my Medical Alert works!  The morning was going so well.  I decided to do a few things around the house before I got dressed.  I made a loaf of Apple Pecan Praline bread.  I washed, blow dried, and styled my hair.  Changed the sheets on our bed and did a load of laundry.  I was going to paint another two doors but because of a dead pigeon I have to wait until tomorrow for that!  I then went in to get dressed for the day.    As is typical, dad followed me into the closet.  I realized that I didn't have my alarm wristband so I went back into the family room and found it.  I brought it into the closet and started dressing.  Grandpa got upset because he wanted to go back to bed (mind you it is 11:00 a.m.) and I told him no.  He picked up my wrist band and slammed it back down on top of the dresser.  Apparently in that process he must have pushed the button.  While dressing I heard someone talking but just thought it was the television.  Once dressed I came into the kitchen and while there I heard a big truck outside of our house.  I went to see what it was and unfortunately it was a big red fire engine!  I was pretty embarrassed when I opened the door.  The very nice fireman explained that they got a call from our Medical alert program and wanted to know if I was okay.  I wasn't because I wasted their time.  They were wonderful and I was able to contact the company to say it was a false alarm.  The rest is history.  Amy got a call, Andy got a call, and Bill got a call so it was nice communicate with each of them especially because it was a false alarm.  I'm sure I will hear from Christian before much longer!  The pathetic part of this whole business was my first thought--Oh good, I have something to put on the blog!  I have a very pathetic life (just kidding)! 

Bismark

Yesterday Miriam went to Bismark for a Knowledge Bowl.  She was part of the Academic team from her high school.  She and her teammates placed 2nd in State.  Way to go Miriam!  On Saturday she took her SAT test and now the big job comes.  Choosing where she will go to college.  Our grandkids are growing up!

Caregiver Tip

#20  It's okay to laugh
I have to admit that sometimes Grandpa cracks me up!  He is totally unaware of what has made me laugh and at times I have to be careful because he doesn't always like it when I do.  What he can't understand is that I'm not laughing at him--I am laughing for him.  President Hinckley once said, "Go forward in life with a twinkle in your eye and a smile on your face, but with great and strong purpose in your heart."  I have come to understand how important his words are.  There are so many moments in the last few years that have reminded me that in spite of the challenges, grief, and worry there are often moments of clarity which remind me why I am doing it and how important it is for Grandpa.  That purpose makes everything more doable.

In the 90's a book was published call Don't Sweat the Small Stuff."  That was everyone's comment when things seemed a little overwhelming.  Many of the struggles that we deal with for Grandpa are small stuff and I want to try and focus on the amazing moments that make me remember when Grandpa would laugh or made me laugh.  Yesterday when we got to the Church parking lot he got so excited that we were at Church.  I said to him, "You are right, but remember that you have to use a quiet voice so we don't disrupt those sitting near us."  He looked at me and said; "I know, I know, I have to be as quiet as a...BEE!"  Mouse, bee--close enough.  I laughed and said that's right!  Last week I needed to get one thing at Hobby Lobby and I did what I often do when I go into a store with Grandpa.  I don't browse, or shop, I "grab and go!"  We went down the first aisle looking for the item I needed and he told me, "Elaine, Elaine, I have a problem."  I turned around just in time to see his pants go down!  Fortunately only the camera in the store witnessed the flasher!  I quickly pulled his pants up, grabbed the item we needed and checked out.  Now you have to admit that is funny.  I think I can admit now that Grandpa's Depends are a life saver.  He doesn't know how to use the toilet when he has big business (I'm sure you get my drift) and I often have to go around the bathroom picking up some droppings that escaped.  When that is happening he says over and over, "Elaine, Elaine, this is awful."  I always laugh because he is so serious.  I want to turn around and say to him;  "You're right! But instead I just say, it's okay we got this.  I could share many times that I have cracked up but you probably get what I am trying to say.

On Pinterest I loved this reminder.  'You don't stop laughing because you grow old!  You grow old because you stop laughing."   Grandpa doesn't get the often subtle nuance of humor and often laughs at inappropriate times but it still makes me smile when he does.

Grandkids be sure to look for the humor in each situation and laugh when you can!

Decision

I got a text today from Meg.  She wrote; "I have decided not to serve a mission right now.  In a couple of years when I am in a different place in my life I may decide to try again....I've prayed about this decision A LOT and I think Heavenly Father approves."  I think all of us have been aware of the struggles that Meg has had to go through to make this decision.  I know for sure, through my personal experiences in the last few years, that Heavenly Father does approve and accepts our offerings when they are freely given.  Meg is amazing and I know all of you will extend your love and support for her.

To Meg I want to share this quote from President Hinckley.  "Please don't nag yourself with thoughts of failure.  Don't set goals far beyond your capacity to achieve.  Simply do what you can do in the best way you know how and the Lord will accept your effort."  

I shared this thought before when Meg was given the option of doing a service mission and would like to share it again.  When Abraham was told to take Isaac and sacrifice him he accepted the request given and painfully put Isaac on the alter in preparation for the hardest thing he would ever have to do.  As he raised the knife the scriptures say, And the angel of the Lord called unto him out of heaven, and said, Abraham, Abraham: and he said, Here am I.  And he said, Lay not thine hand upon the lad...for now I know that thou fearest God." (Genesis 22:11-12)  Thank you Meg for your desire to serve.  Thanks for being willing to offer your services to the Lord.  Please continue to do your best and move forward in faith as we are all expected to do.  I love you Granddaughter and I am so proud of you.

Scout Advancement

Our family has had a busy weekend!  Congratulations to Will for his Scout Advancement. 

Pictures From Perry

2019 Winning Team--Go BYU

Teammates

I hope Perry didn't win that!

Perry's Specialty

Slow and Steady!

Music Excellence

Lincoln performed with the Highland High Sinfonia Orchestra in Los Angeles at the Southern California Music Festival.  They were awarded the ranking of Superior with Distinction which means a 10/10 score from both judges!  While there, their orchestra members got to go to Universal Studios to the Wizarding World of Harry Potter. Sounds like Lincoln just had a great time wherever he went!

First Place

As most of you knew Perry was a part of a team of students who were going to participate in the 2019 National Collegiate Landscape Competition.  Perry had to submit an application to be part of the team and then he also had to take a class for all participants to prepare for the competition.  This year it was held in Colorado.  I am so proud of Perry and the other students.  They placed first in the competition.  For BYU it is even more impressive because this is the third win in a row for them.  I will add pictures as soon as Perry has time to send them.  What a great experience and I think it is safe to say that Perry had a great time and worked really hard.

Road Trip

It was time for another field trip for Grandpa and me.  This time I drove south east to a town called Florence.  I had never been there before and it's claim to fame when I was a kid was that it was where the prison was.  The trip was beautiful with all of the green in the desert and the blooming wildflowers.  Just before we got into the downtown area there was a small mountain that had a pyramid shaped monument on it.  I found out later that it is called Poston Butte and it is where Charles D. Poston, known as the Father of Arizona, was buried.  During World War II Florence had the largest P.O.W. camp for German and Italian soldiers.  (A side note: We had a family in our ward when I was growing up and he had been in that camp.  After the war he went back to Germany and brought his family back to Phoenix to live.)  There was also a Japanese Internment camp located there.  Florence is the county seat of Pinal County and is considered a National Historic District.  The courthouse was built in 1876 and the high school in 1887.  Both are still being used.  Another claim to fame for Florence was the death of a famous actor named Tom Mix.  He was speeding and lost control of his car.  There is also a marker there for him.  The town was small but interesting.  I didn't get pictures of much of the interesting things because if I stop the yelling begins!  I just enjoy the fun places we see as we drive by.   I am thinking about where we will go next!

This is a historical marker about Charles Poston

This is one of the six prisons in Florence.

Florence also had a silver mine at one time.

St. Patrick's Day Green Dinner

I miss having our California Duncan's to have dinner with on special occasions but thankfully the Whitney's are willing to keep us company and celebrate special holidays.  I have a thing
for holidays as you know!  Along with the Corned beef and cabbage we had Irish soda bread, pistachio salad, boiled new potatoes, green beans, limeade and then for dessert we had rainbow sherbet floats and shamrock sugar cookies frosted with green icing.  It was pretty nice!

New Project

I have started a new project that will take a while to complete.  As you know that makes me very happy.  I am planning on repainting all the doors in the house.  I did the first one yesterday and am really pleased with the way it has turned out. 

One down and 12 to go!  I hope you can tell which one was repainted!

Quote

                 "Everything you are learning                                    is preparing you for something else."
                                                       Marjorie Pay Hinckley

Caregiver Tip

#19  Being schooled
I'm a huge fan of NCIS if you haven't heard that before, and I'm with Gibbs when he says there are no coincidences.  I truly believe that much of what has happened in the last 20 years was a preparation for becoming a caregiver to Grandpa.  I am a realist now and I know that Grandpa has no idea who I am most of the time.  Sometimes when I leave him with Aunt Amy and come back I am just another person in his life but with no significant relationship.  I have to admit that I am nervous when I am away from him and although I know he is in very good hands I hurry so I can get back.  I guess the truth is that I want him to need me!  Being with sweet grandma the last two years of her life made it clear that she loved me but she thought I was her sister Erma and she always told everyone that when I came to see her.  I knew that if I didn't come back she would be okay but I couldn't stay away because she was still my mom and I loved her and was grateful that she loved her sister Erma.   

When Aunt Amy was having serious complications with her last pregnancies I was able to help out a great deal and I loved it.  I can remember driving back to California on a number of occasions and having to pull into the rest stop to take a short nap because I was so tired from a week of helping.  I remember on one particular occasion thinking to myself, "at least I know I can do hard things!"  I say that all the time.  While serving as missionaries in New Hampshire I realized that when "God calls he qualifies."  Because of that I was able to pick up everything we needed to know and help Grandpa especially the last three months when he couldn't keep pace.  When he slowed down I was able to speed up and our daily number of documents remained high to the last day.  I again have a perfect knowledge that I have been called and Heavenly Father is qualifying me to keep up the work that needs to be done to help Grandpa.  

There is so much information on the internet about dealing with Alzheimer's disease.  Much of it isn't what my experiences have been but I read it anyway, just in case there might be.  I have learned much more from casual comments made by others.  Your great Aunt Bev is wonderful to me and to Grandpa and she has given me more perspective than anyone I know.  I often think how much our family missed because we weren't closer to them.  While still living in California Grandpa was pretty obnoxious in a Pizza place where we were picking up a pizza.  I apologized to the man who was seeing Grandpa at his worst.  When we left the restaurant and I got him in the car the man came to the sidewalk in front of the car and motioned me to come.  I walked over and he told me his Father-in-law had Alzheimer's too.  He then put his arms around me and kissed my cheek and said, "You can do this."  I often repeat those words because at that moment nothing could have meant more to me that a quiet recognition of how hard this mean disease can be.  

Grandkids, each of you are being schooled for something.  You won't get it from a college education (but go to college!) but from the school of daily life.  Be aware of what is happening around you.  Look at each experience as a teaching moment to help you later in life.  Remember to remember and step up to any challenge that may come your way.  You got this--and so do I!                                         

Beautiful North Dakota

Aunt Becky sent these pictures of their return home.  She wrote, "There are definitely some beautiful things that you can see here."  She is so right and in spite of the snow and cold they have made a wonderful home for their family in a beautiful area.  On the left is what she calls a "sun dog" and on the bottom you can see the snow hasn't quite melted yet.  But it will!  She was excited to see the 30 degree temperature and by the end of the week it will be in the 40's.  It's all relative isn't it.  Every place you live has special and unique things about it and that's why it is true that you should "grow where you're planted!

Now all they need to do is pray that the snow melts slowly so the Red River doesn't flood!!  Just saying.

Last Day

Today the whole family spent the day together.  They made a trip to Griffith park and hiked to the observatory.  Miriam got a picture taken with the Hollywood sign in the background.  Becky said one thing she won't miss is the Los Angeles traffic.  I know exactly how she feels!

Girl's Camp

Katie was called last week to be the assistant girls camp leader.  The girls are lucky to have her there!  The theme of their camp this year is, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."  They are using the Rosie the Riveter as part of the theme.  At their kick-off night Abby got her picture taken and I think she is a cute Rosie!

Addendum

It's a new day and I have been reminded that I have to remember!  The reality of Alzheimer's disease is that every day brings challenges.  Some we are able to deal with and others that often overwhelm us.  Yesterday I was overwhelmed.  Today I am grateful.  Grandpa remembered how to use the toilet this morning.  He had a sweet conversation with someone in the night.  He went to church and took the Sacrament.  He loved watching Spencer's Mountain on the television and was calm and peaceful through the whole movie.  He had moments of panic but today they were brief.  I am honored to be given such a gift to remember all of the wonderful memories that are stored in my mind and my heart.  Life is good and I am grateful to be a part of it!  What an incredible journey Grandpa and I are having!

The Reason

You may have thought that Uncle Ben and family came to California to warm up but that is just a side benefit of their trip.  Owen had his Junior Recital last night and his family was able to be there to support and enjoy all of Owen's years of practice which definitely paid off.  Aunt Becky said he was wonderful (he is!) and they enjoyed sharing the occasion together as a family.  As you can see from the extra picture they are taking advantage of the California weather.  I suspect they were probably the only ones who weren't wrapped up trying to stay warm!

Caregiver Tip

#18  Be kind to yourself
When I first started thinking about my caregiver tips I just made a list of things as I thought of then.  It is interesting that today the tip was--Be kind to yourself.  Actually the whole title is; Be kind to yourself because they aren't able to be.  For the past two weeks Grandpa has been so belligerent and inconsolable much of each day, which is definitely new and very painful to watch.  He has had outbursts since the signs of Alzheimer's started to show themselves, but they were short-lived and infrequent.  I am dealing with the painful reality that something new is afoot.  Sadly, this means that Grandpa is mean (I hate to even say the word) and unable to calm down in spite of trying many things to divert him away from what is upsetting him.

At least 20 times today he has screamed that he hates me.  I know he doesn't but in spite of myself it always hurts my feelings. This afternoon he was upset with me because I asked him to do something he didn't want to do.  He turned around and yelled, "ELAINE, I WANT YOU TO KNOW, I DON'T LIKE YOU!"  I'm sad to admit that I long for his bedtime routine as much as he does now.  From 6:30 until I go to bed I am not being yelled at, grabbed, or reminded that I don't measure up.  Okay,  I need to go back to Caregiver tip #9; Pity parties need to be short! 

Every thing that is happening with Grandpa is what is going to happen when the Alzheimer's disease is in the late stage.  I had hoped the short outbursts would be all that I would deal with but that is not to be.  In spite of this new development I am okay.  I continually get words of encouragement from Amy who often has to deal with him as well.  I'm not crying which fascinates me!  Grandkids, I know I have pointed this out to you in the past but it needs to be repeated--"Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me" is a big lie!  Make sure your words built up and not tear down others.  Grandpa can't help what he is doing but each of us certainly can and it is something we need to work on all the time.

New Shoes

No more shoes that have to be tied!  Grandpa is now "hip and happening!"

Are We Happy Yet?

Graham's facial expressions fascinate me!

Concordia Campus Visit

Watching Softball Game

The ND Duncans spent the day on campus.  Miriam went to some science classes on campus with Owens friends so she could see what college classes are like.  They all attended chapel time which is a mini church service each day.  They ate in the cafeteria and then attended a recital of some of Owen's friend.  They were able to watch a softball game--Concordia won!  In the evening  they attended Owen's concert where the choir performed the same program that they did while in Hawaii.  Another great day for all of them!

This is a poster advertising Owen's Junior Recital

Owen's Hawaiian Choir Concert Performance

Eden Kate--February 2019

Caregiver Tip

#17 Ministering Angels
I have hesitated writing about this because the sacredness of the subject is something that I want to recognize but realize that each person is individual in their course of the disease.  That being said, I have asked myself so many times; How do people who don't believe in God ever handle all that is required when your loved one has Alzheimer's disease.  I do know that I have a loving Heavenly Father and a Savior, Jesus Christ who knows me, listens to my pleas, and answers my prayers in many different ways.  The most significant experiences I have had involved your grandpa in the quiet of the night.  In the Book of Mormon, 2nd Nephi 4:23 it says, "Behold, he hath heard my cry by day, and he hath given me knowledge by visions in the nighttime."  I believe that your Grandpa is being taught by ministering angels.  It started several months ago.  He goes to bed around 6:30 and I usually head to bed at about 11 p.m.  One night at I got to the bedroom door I heard your grandpa singing a hymn.  When I quietly opened the door the singing stopped.  A short while after I settled into bed he had a conversation.  In it he said, "I had never thought of that"  "I see."  This has become a very typical thing and I have listened quietly because I know that he is talking to someone.  One night after I had fallen asleep I was woken by Grandpa.  He was loudly humming "Oh Thou Fount of Every Blessing."

Come, Thou Fount of every blessing

Tune my heart to sing Thy grace

Streams of mercy, never ceasing

Call for songs of loudest praise

Teach me some melodious sonnet

Sung by flaming tongues above

Praise the mount, I'm fixed upon it

Mount of Thy redeeming love...

It lasted a brief few seconds but it was so wonderful to hear.  During this time he has begun to talk about his father a lot.  I can't say that they were ever particularly close, but lately he has told me on a number of occasions things about his dad.  He asked me once where his dad was.  I told him that he had died a number of years ago and he was so surprised by that.  I had mentioned to your great Aunt Bev about grandpas conversations and she said I should use my phone and record what he says.  But I realized that it wasn't important to record what he is saying, but remember what I feel when I hear his sweet words.  He is being schooled and comforted and I have the privilege of knowing that.

Joshua Tree Natl. Park

 Today the ND Duncans spent the day at the Joshua Tree National Park.  I realized that I am the only one in our family who has never been there!  To celebrate PI day they had pizza to celebrate.

L.A. Zoo

Peter watching an Alligator sun himself

The vacation continues with a visit to the Los Angeles Zoo.  I think the North Dakota Duncans are taking advantage of the beautiful weather!  They met up later with Owen and some of his friends and enjoyed some sushi. 

Jeremy swimming with the turtle

Warming Up!

Minneapolis Airport

The North Dakota Duncan's have left the cold behind and are now in Southern California to spend time with Owen.  She wrote; "I really wanted to take a picture at our house.  The snow down our driveway is higher than the van is in most places.  Exiting our street, which is typically a 3 car road, is now looking more like a one lane road--thankfully at 5 a.m. no one is around.  Unfortunately, that will be waiting for us when we get home."  I would not have comprehended what she was saying if we hadn't lived one winter in New Hampshire!  I suspect in the coming year we will hear from Ellis with similar stories.  Let's hope someone takes pity on Ben and Becky and cleans off their driveway while they are gone!  More pictures to follow.

Peter outside of their hotel in sunny California

Caregiver Tip

#16  It's okay to remember
As I have mentioned a number of times I read almost everything that I see about Alzheimer's.  I don't always agree with a lot of things because I live with it each day and realize that each person is an individual and their reactions and progress in the decline is different.  One thing I have definitely disagreed with is something I have read a number of times.  "Never say remember."  A part of me wants Grandpa to remember if only the smallest things.  As I interact with him each day I often encourage him to never forget that I love him.  I want him to see one of you and say, "I know you!"  Yesterday the Bishop came to our house to interview me for my temple recommend.  Grandpa sat next to me and as the Bishop asked the questions he responded to each question.  He had no idea what was happening but that wasn't important to me.  He knew what the answer should be.  I smiled as I thought of his typical response now to every question.  It is an adamant NO!  But not yesterday as he was firm in a positive response.  The Bishop said to him, "You've probably asked these questions many times and Grandpa replied, "yes I have."  That is enough for me.  Every once in a while there is a moment of clarity and asking him to remember gives him those brief moments.  

I get to remember as well.  I remember the first dance we had together over 48 years ago.  I remember the hiccups he got as we walked around the Mesa Temple where he had planned to propose but was so nervous.  I remember the parking lot of the church when he told me that we should be married because the song in Sacrament meeting said, 'mark how judgments pointing finger, justifies no vain delays.'  (Israel, Israel, God is Calling) I remember when each of your parents were born and your Grandpa was beside himself with joy.  I remember what a good father he was and once they started walking he was always close by just in case they fell.  I remember hearing him in their bedrooms reading books out loud to each of them.  And then each of you were born and he was in Grandpa mode from the beginning.  He would play with you, read to you, and talk to you about anything you wanted to talk about.  And the list goes on!  It is okay to remember.  In fact, it is important to remember!

We remember his love when he can no longer remember.   And that is good.

Arizona Duncans

They now have ferry boat tours available, as well as a marina
market and a restaurant.  I was surprised how many people were
in the water.  I would think it was still pretty cold!

After a very difficult morning I made a decision.  We were going on a trip!  I was inspired by the fun one that our California Duncans had.  So I put Grandpa in the car and we headed out of town.  Today I took him to Saguaro Lake.  I hadn't been there since I was a teenager and it was fun to see it again.  Much had changed and there were definitely upgrades since we were there last.  I thought Grandpa would be more impressed.  He wasn't, but I definitely enjoyed our little jaunt.  The desert is so beautiful right now and it was nice to see the lavender and yellow wild flowers  When I was about 11 our cousins from Texas came for a visit and we went to the lake for the day.  My mom packed a big picnic for us and we had a great time.  The problem was that we didn't have sunscreen in those days and by the time we got home everyone looked like cooked lobsters.  It was so bad that most of us were throwing up and had a miserable few days.  Today was much better!

The lake was formed in about 1930 when the dam was built.

When we went to the lake there were no covered picnic areas.

Thought of Perry & Ellis when I saw this mountain to climb!

This is the Stewart Mountain Dam that made Saguaro Lake